This day will suck…

This day will suck because…

There are really no words to describe why this day will suck…

This day will suck for me…

This day will only suck for me…

To think…

To think I had a chance…

To THINK that is the truth…

It’s so much easier to tell the truth

Hey everyone reading and thank you for taking the time out of your life to read some words from this Human.

The title should be familiar to many and if not I will explain. My grandmother always told me growing up to stop making a mountain from a molehill. It basically means making too much of minor issues. So in my life its turning all the little things into a bigger issue causing a mountain and driving people away at times or at least making it hard to deal with me. To give you insight I am going to talk about a flaw of mine and try explain my thought process and more then likely get lost in the middle of hundreds of words.  Get ready for a ride on the Chris Brain Train.

So I make mountains out of the little things. I always have. I look at life as a puzzle and I feel like all things are connected. I overthink. Raise your hand if you do the same. It builds and builds driving those close to me crazy. The thing is in my mind all issues no matter how small are connected. I can turn a simple comment made into a debate on judgment. It’s really ridiculous. So for all those ready that know me I sincerely apologize for how I may react to little issues and turn them to something they should have never turned into. But…….

Even the smallest issues matter. Take a second and ponder that. Think of it like this, your mother or father had a issue with something you did as a child and their reaction was to address the issue and correct the behaviour. Was this right or wrong? Depends on the issue and how you were raised but either way we have been groomed from a young age to address even the smallest of issues whether others agree or not on our view point. Let me guess you think at this point I am trying to get out of behaviour that I have…you’re wrong. See I believe the best way to explain things is through my thought process. Flawed maybe but you can begin to understand my point from my perspective. In a friendship there are many quirks that drive you crazy about your friends. So small issues you may have are excess talking, opinions, nervous ticks and maybe failed fashion. As friends we see fit to address those issue in an attempt to help our friends. But are we helping? In a relationship you address small issues that make you insecure instead of trusting you build a complex overthought out puzzle. You create a mountain that really just builds a wall. But none the less I still feel that even the smallest issues no matter the type of relationship should be addressed. ADDRESSED no corrected. See correction is a word that places a fault or wrong. We are all different and my issues are not the same issues you may have. Address don not attempt to correct.

I have been told that my opinions (advise) that I have given in the past was too strong. I made the other person feel like no matter what they said I was pushing my opinions as if they were the gold standard. I am sorry. See I have been through a great deal in life. I was molested when I was young. I experimented with sex very early on. I had a drug problem. I had a gambling problem. I have truly seen more then most people would realize and experienced things no one should have too. So when I give advise or my opinion I promise it comes from a good place. It really comes from the heart. I apologize to all that I have offended or who have felt I was pushing my ideals. If you are readying this and know me please know that I have only ever wanted the best for each and everyone one of you. We all have to live and learn through our choices and please take my advise and opinions for what they are, my advise and opinions.

The take away..

I make mountains out of molehills and I push my opinion on others. This is a correct assumption of  who I might be seen as but let me quickly express my view.

I take small issues and try to understand the thought process to a point it pisses people off because i can make it make sense. I give my opinion out of care and concern so people do not make the mistakes I have made in the past. I offer my advise as a guide partnered with my opinion to give people a differently perspective on how the outcome could be. Of course I completely understand that just because things went a certain way for me doesn’t warrant the same out come for others. But it could and that what I offer. I offer the what if, I ask the why and I try and address the smallest of issues. Of course I would be a liar if I didn’t admit to trying to correct some but again we are groomed to do so at times.

This was word vomit at its best. Thanks for reading. Just remember that before you make those mountains think first. I am going to get better at keeping issues as molehills and try my best from forming mountains. At the same time remember just because somebody makes mountain doesn’t always mean they know. If you know someone like me please be link them to this blog…Just kidding allow for some patience and understand maybe its because they truly care for you.